Golden Axe Beast=Rider is one of those games that was largely ignored on release, but it had quite a nice box and a good gaming history so I thought would be worth getting when it was cheap and now is the time of cheapness.
At first glance it sems to have nothing to do with proper Golden Axe, no dead friend Alex or anything, but on closer inspection theres actually quite a lot of Golden Axe in there but it's hidden under a lot of gushing blood and repetative scenery.
In fact if Hollywood were to make a movie of Golden Axe this is what the movie would be. It looks like a realistic Golden Axe, stuff happens like it would in Golden Axe, yet some how it entirely misses what Golden Axe should be.
I never thought I would hear Gilius Thunderhead Say "By my balls!" but thanks to Bast=Rider I have.
All the levels involve running a long a bit, killing some enemies then moving on to the next bit.
Every level is a wasteland, wilderness wasteland, desert wasteland, castle wasteland, you get the idea.
The scenery is decorated by badly drawn strung up naked corpses. A 14 year whose only possesion is a pirate VHS copy of Conan would think it's cool.
Golden Axe, Beast=Rider has for some reason decided rhythm action combat is the way to go.
The combat involves lots of dodging depending on the colour of the enemies sword glows, after your dodge you get an extra strong attack which is a pain if you are ryhtmetically challenged like me.
It can also mean standing around waiting for someone to try and hit you so you can use your strong strike back.
Riding beasts is actually good fun, but the problem is the mighty beasts are very fragile, and they tend to explode in a fountain of blood after bumping into things, or using a special move.
You can only have one beast at a time so this means after your beast has stubbed its toe and taken a load of damage the best thing to do is to jump off it and then lop its head off, and run back and get a new one. Tyris flare is no friend of endangered species thats for sure.
Despite all this the game is kind of compelling, just to see whats going to happen next or at least unlock another Tyris Flare costume, I have spent more time on this than MW2 singe player, Infinity Ward are probably kicking themselves for not including more semi naked desert warrior women in MW2. I know I am.
Overall - Nobody tosses a dwarf
At first glance it sems to have nothing to do with proper Golden Axe, no dead friend Alex or anything, but on closer inspection theres actually quite a lot of Golden Axe in there but it's hidden under a lot of gushing blood and repetative scenery.
In fact if Hollywood were to make a movie of Golden Axe this is what the movie would be. It looks like a realistic Golden Axe, stuff happens like it would in Golden Axe, yet some how it entirely misses what Golden Axe should be.
I never thought I would hear Gilius Thunderhead Say "By my balls!" but thanks to Bast=Rider I have.
All the levels involve running a long a bit, killing some enemies then moving on to the next bit.
Every level is a wasteland, wilderness wasteland, desert wasteland, castle wasteland, you get the idea.
The scenery is decorated by badly drawn strung up naked corpses. A 14 year whose only possesion is a pirate VHS copy of Conan would think it's cool.
Golden Axe, Beast=Rider has for some reason decided rhythm action combat is the way to go.
The combat involves lots of dodging depending on the colour of the enemies sword glows, after your dodge you get an extra strong attack which is a pain if you are ryhtmetically challenged like me.
It can also mean standing around waiting for someone to try and hit you so you can use your strong strike back.
Riding beasts is actually good fun, but the problem is the mighty beasts are very fragile, and they tend to explode in a fountain of blood after bumping into things, or using a special move.
You can only have one beast at a time so this means after your beast has stubbed its toe and taken a load of damage the best thing to do is to jump off it and then lop its head off, and run back and get a new one. Tyris flare is no friend of endangered species thats for sure.
Despite all this the game is kind of compelling, just to see whats going to happen next or at least unlock another Tyris Flare costume, I have spent more time on this than MW2 singe player, Infinity Ward are probably kicking themselves for not including more semi naked desert warrior women in MW2. I know I am.
Overall - Nobody tosses a dwarf
Do you know what, I've only just clicked on the cosplay pic above and the Tyris=Flare is pretty hot you know
ReplyDeleteGillius Thunderhead is hilarious in that pic ! I dont know why it makes me laugh though.
ReplyDeleteAx=battler drew the short straw, he only gets to wear his pants.
I would have come as death=adder, with cardboard armour